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I was just thinking...

Allow Me To Sing You A Deal

By: Mike Farmer
Tuesday, August 21, 2007 3:18 PM

Real estate agent styles of doing business are like different types of music. You have the classical – the ones with the elegant websites who sell $50,000,000,000.00 homes who have elegant names like Elizabeth Harding-Vandersmilt or Roderick J. Haltmeyer. These agents are big on appointments, staging through the top design companies, knowing all the best restaurants and who married whom from which family, if, that is, the families involved are significant.

 

Then you have the rock-and-roll agent who bumps and grinds, pounding toward success. This guy or gal goes wide open and jams out in the selling process – these agents sing a loud and righteous tune with plenty of bass and drum action. Watch out for these guys and gals, if they get a client under their spell it’s all over.

 

Then there's the jazz agent, a cool agent indeed! An eclectic agent, a chameleon, a zig and zagger, zany, zopey, calm and hectic, a riffer, a player in black, white - hell, purple if the moon is right, a downtown mixer and a uptown lover, this agent is off-the-cuff but don’t be fooled, there’s method to the madness, reason in every riff.

 

Then there’s the country music agent, a down-home type who plays mental possum but is sharp as a tack. This agent says Yes Ma’am and Yes Sir and humbly says Oh, it was nothin’ to the client’s praise at the closing table and discreetly puts the commission check in a suede jacket, all the while smiling big and spinning a yarn. This agent is about real life, real people and real deals.

 

Okay, I’m tired, you all can add more.

 

Mike from Savannah

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Comments

Sharron and Steve Lobman
Member Since '06

Sharron and Steve Lobman said:

How would you describe the new "crumping" agents??? lol

August 21, 2007 1:38 PM
Lonn Dugan
Member Since '05

Lonn Dugan said:

How about the Pop Charts Agent, who can say all the right words, ranks at top of chart, knows all the popular neighborhoods, but has no staying power? He can help a buyer buy or sell a house, as long as it fits his 3.5 minute mainstream format, or he moves on to the next buyer / seller? It all sounds good, kind of catchy, but a little short on subtance.

August 21, 2007 1:42 PM
Mike Farmer
Member Since '03

Mike Farmer said:

They are the ones who forget they took the course and passed the test until 2 years down the road when someone casually asks them if they know anything about real estate.

"Uh, uh, yeah, as a matter of fact, I think I do, I think."

It turns out the questioner is a new hip-hop artist who buys a $50,000,000,000 through this agent. A home listed by Elizabeth Harding-Vandersmilt. The young krumper takes his commission split, opens a night club that becomes wildly successfull, then marries Paris Hilton.

August 21, 2007 1:50 PM
Mike Farmer
Member Since '03

Mike Farmer said:

Then there's cacophony.

August 21, 2007 2:08 PM
Sharron and Steve Lobman
Member Since '06

Sharron and Steve Lobman said:

I just have to cackle every time I hear that word: "cacophony!"  I hate to be around it, but I still like that word.

Another favorite word of mine is "pontificate."

Anyway, sorry for the word rant!

Pity the poor krumper who gets stuck with Paris!

And lets not forget the diva agent. Looks good, but...oy, the whining!

August 21, 2007 2:13 PM
Mary Welch
Member Since '04

Mary Welch said:

And then there is RAP. Alot of talk and alot of action, but you get your fill of it awful quick. But that is AFTER you realize you have no idea what they said and they words you could make out didn't make sense.

I personally don't like the ones with a line of RAP.

August 21, 2007 2:16 PM
Mike Farmer
Member Since '03

Mike Farmer said:

August 21, 2007 2:30 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

Opera . . . full of spectacle, drama. Tears are shed, but it all works out at the end--unless the hero dies.   LOL

Marching band . . . fall in line, people! Never misses a beat.

I'm a rock and roller, meself . . . ;)

August 21, 2007 2:48 PM
Trista Anderson
Member Since '04

Trista Anderson said:

EMO agent - attention seeking and highly verbal.  Spends so much time talking to the clients about their life, their preferences, their own home that the inevitable happens and the clients, unable to handle this type of emotional outpouring, leave to find the EMO's polar opposite - the 'Man in Black' Realtor.  EMO's are often seen in the brokers office crying about the lack of referrals - or the quality of the referrals they have been given.  EMO's also feel they alone deserve recognition and often switch companies, take 'therapy' vacations and redo their agent photo frequently.

*For those over 12 - EMO stands for 'emotional' and is a type of music and style.  Well, they call it style...

August 21, 2007 3:00 PM
Mike Farmer
Member Since '03

Mike Farmer said:

August 21, 2007 3:04 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

LOL . . . yep all good . . .

August 21, 2007 3:42 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

Then let's not forget the 'speedmetal' genre . . . they yell and everything had to be done yesterday . . . call 10x/day for answers when they were already told when they would get a response. Usually chemically enhanced, always irritating.

August 21, 2007 3:44 PM
Craig Barrett
Member Since '07

Craig Barrett said:

How about the new age genre? This agent is smooth, mellow and very easy to work with. However, this agent is so "out there" details like home inspection and settlement times are forgotten. They can be just as irritating as the "speedmetal genre" Candice referred too, because they need to be told everything at least twice. It's important to recognize them early to keep the process moving.

August 21, 2007 4:34 PM
Mike Farmer
Member Since '03

Mike Farmer said:

Oh God, I know about the new age agent -- The lack of urgency when urgency is required kills me.

But at least you can experience the Oneness of the Universe with them, that's always a good thing.

August 21, 2007 4:46 PM
Vanessa Stalets
Member Since '07

Vanessa Stalets said:

What about the good ole Southern Rock Agent!

Been here forever, changed a note or two along the way to keep current, but the basics are still good old fashioned musical work.

Being in Nashville myself, this is my vote~

August 21, 2007 5:02 PM
Howard Arnoff
Member Since '03

Howard Arnoff said:

Mike, what about the "know it all" we all have to deal with who ultimately really knows nothing at all.

Think about the outcome that Carole King sang about in Tapestry, "It's Too Late".

August 21, 2007 5:57 PM

Guest

Karin Hnna said:

The wonderful thing about real estate is that! A very cool obsevation and analysis and it made me laugh, thankyou. The wonderful thing about real estate is that we are all different and there is no one way you must be to be successful . I think you just need to focus on being your best self and being real, the homework we all must do as in follow up, marketing etc is all the same. My clients are all very different and do things a little differently but they all do well and love what they do. That is the gift in real estate opportunity for all of us.

August 21, 2007 7:52 PM
Karen Weger
Member Since '05

Karen Weger said:

Classical Rock. They know everything. They have danced bigger dances. They have achieved higher notes than you. NOT.

August 21, 2007 8:15 PM
Larry Bertok
Member Since '06

Larry Bertok said:

I know in this market, It's a long way to the top if you want to rock-and-roll! Just my 2-cents

August 22, 2007 6:55 AM
Sharron and Steve Lobman
Member Since '06

Sharron and Steve Lobman said:

This is a tad off topic--but New Age Clients are no picnic either!!

August 22, 2007 7:27 AM
Mike Farmer
Member Since '03

Mike Farmer said:

Sharron - I have met some people with the new age mindset that were grounded in their own way, very cool people, and then some way out there in a superficial way that is irritating.

I have come to think the difference is that some people naturally march to a different drummer, and some posture trying to find an identity.

Larry -- Which market?

August 22, 2007 7:45 AM
Beth Larsen
Member Since '05

Beth Larsen said:

Then there are the ones who don't worry about the genre, like a little bit of everything if the tune is good and it sets the mood, and match it to their client's tastes...

Great analogies....so Mike, which are you? You know we're all guessing.

August 22, 2007 7:48 AM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

<<<--envisioning Mikey in top hat and tails, with vaudevillian piano music playing while he captivates his clients.

Either that or Allman Bros ... LOL

August 22, 2007 8:15 AM
Mike Farmer
Member Since '03

Mike Farmer said:

It's funny, Beth, I have gone from the rock and roll sixties to more of a folk-type dude in the seventies, to jazz in the eighties, to alternative country in the nineties -- and, now, maybe a mixture of all those -- plus what Candice said - a tad of vaudeville, maybe a little bit of the old crooners' soul in me, too. My mother listened to Dean Martin, Frank Sinatra and that whole group, giving me an early crooner influence --

"When the moon hits your eye Like a big pizza pie That's amore!"  

August 22, 2007 8:41 AM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

LOL in my baby book it says for first song: Mack The Knife. :)

August 22, 2007 8:45 AM
Beth Larsen
Member Since '05

Beth Larsen said:

You're a bit of a Chameleon Mike, not a bad trait to have in these changing times! I confess to loving the old Big Band swing era, too. Great fun to dance to.

August 22, 2007 8:46 AM
Sharron and Steve Lobman
Member Since '06

Sharron and Steve Lobman said:

Just don't yodel!

August 22, 2007 9:52 AM
Mike Farmer
Member Since '03

Mike Farmer said:

Hmmm, the yodeling style real estate agent...that's a hard one.... I'm trying to think if I know any yodeling type realtors....hmmm....yodeling...yodeling....

Give me some time.

August 22, 2007 10:52 AM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

Yodeling agent wears suspenders and little Alpine hat with Bermuda shorts . . . I don't care, if y'all want to yodel fine, just bring offers and fill in the contracts completely,

And DON'T SAY REE-LA-TER . . . LOL

August 22, 2007 1:21 PM
Sharron and Steve Lobman
Member Since '06

Sharron and Steve Lobman said:

No, it is real-a-tor...yoda-lady-hoo!

August 22, 2007 2:27 PM
Sharron and Steve Lobman
Member Since '06

Sharron and Steve Lobman said:

No, it is real-a-tor...yoda-lady-hoo!

August 22, 2007 2:28 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

Noooo hooo hooo hooo! You didn't know I could yodel too didja!  ;)

August 22, 2007 2:33 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

It's REAL-TOR.  no A

August 22, 2007 2:34 PM
Phil Anderson
Member Since '04

Phil Anderson said:

Nuke'-u-ler?

August 22, 2007 2:34 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

SO give the extra vowel back to Vanna and ask for $ back . . . LOL

August 22, 2007 2:34 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

NO NO NO

August 22, 2007 2:34 PM
Sharron and Steve Lobman
Member Since '06

Sharron and Steve Lobman said:

How about a nuke'-u-ler real-a-ter? Yod-a-little-lady-hoooooo!

By the way, nice yodel, Candice.

When I was a librarian-the kids called me a li-berry-un---and I worked in the li-berry.

I used to tell them that there is a strawberry, blackberry, blueberry--but there ain't no li-berry!!!!!

August 22, 2007 2:38 PM
Phil Anderson
Member Since '04

Phil Anderson said:

Hey look at me!

I'm a nuke'-u-ler real-a-ter in the li-berry!  Take a pitcher!  It'll last longer!

August 22, 2007 2:43 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

LOLOLOL Sharron there is to a liberry  . . . when the berry lied and said it was a orange . . .

Phil you are definitely nuclear, this is a fact.  ;)

It's official. Mama we're all crazee now!

August 22, 2007 2:46 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

TOO. You guys bad habits rubbing off on me. You know how impressionable I am . . . geesh

August 22, 2007 2:51 PM
Sharron and Steve Lobman
Member Since '06

Sharron and Steve Lobman said:

OUR bad habits? Hmmmmmm.....

Sometimes I don't speak right...

But that don't mean I don't know what I'm talkin' abight...

Why can't we be friends?

lol

August 22, 2007 5:52 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

LOL sometimes I don't  . . . speak . . . right . . . but then I know what I'm talking about

I LOVE THAT!

August 22, 2007 6:09 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

the world is a ghetto . . . OK Sharron I retract now that you've got me singing WAR, lol

I am fully responsible for all my foibles and usually have a hand in others . . . LOLOLOL

August 22, 2007 6:10 PM
Sharron and Steve Lobman
Member Since '06

Sharron and Steve Lobman said:

Okay- if I was on Singing Bee, I would have lost! When I typed it I knew something was amiss!

Thanks for the correct lyrics.

The next line is

Why can't we be friends??

August 22, 2007 6:12 PM
Sharron and Steve Lobman
Member Since '06

Sharron and Steve Lobman said:

lol- What is it good for?

August 22, 2007 6:14 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

YES! different song, same band . . . walking down the street . . . starry eyed. . . . looking at the sky . . . . smoggy eyed . . .  searching for a place (searching for a place searching for a place) weary eyed . . . crying in the night . . . teary eyed . . . don't you know that it's true that for me and for you THE WORLD IS A GHETTO

August 22, 2007 6:16 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

That's Edwin Starr . . . War HUH what is it good for absolutely NOTHING

August 22, 2007 6:16 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

Sharron it is hard for me to not sing  LOL

August 22, 2007 6:17 PM
Sharron and Steve Lobman
Member Since '06

Sharron and Steve Lobman said:

and that's why I moved to the mountains!  Over 50% National Forest in my county...so the world can only be 50% GHETTO!

August 22, 2007 6:18 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

LOLOLOL even if about not so pretty stuff such beautiful songs, I have big box set of War love love it

August 22, 2007 6:19 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

And Tower of Power

August 22, 2007 6:20 PM
Sharron and Steve Lobman
Member Since '06

Sharron and Steve Lobman said:

I honestly did not know who sang the songs, but I LOVED them! They bring back memory of my younger days.

I pretty much like to yodel nowadays! lol NOT

August 22, 2007 6:24 PM
Candice A Donofrio
Member Since '07

Candice A Donofrio said:

ROFL thank you for not yodeling . . . we should create a sign with a red circle slash over a Ricola guy . . . .

August 22, 2007 6:47 PM

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